Pretend Parents for a Day

I met a friend for brunch today. We were both craving for waffles and turkey bacon so we made plans to meet up, and we did our usual ritual of snuggling and telling each other everything that happened recently while waiting for our food.

I told him that a friend of mine was pregnant and I was going to be a godmother, and that I felt curiously jealous because I loved kids but had a phobia of giving birth.

“So do you want a baby?” he asked, pulling on my ear teasingly.

“Yes. No. I don’t know.” I puffed out my cheeks and looked at him quizzically. “Why are you asking?”

He smirked at me. “I can help you with the baby-making part,” he whispered.

I laughed and hit him jokingly. “Stop saying weird things,” I complained.

He caught my wrist. “I’m serious though,” he said. “We could get married. You can have your baby. We’re both good-looking so the child is guaranteed to be cute.”

I looked at him skeptically. “That sounds like a marriage proposal.”

He shrugged this time. “Sounds like a good idea, right?”

“I guess so. But…you’re gay.”

He smiled and pulled me in a hug. “I’m not gay all the time,” he teased.me.

I turned to stare at him. “What the fuck does that mean?”

He nudged me. “You know. Times like these when I can see down your shirt, I don’t feel very gay at all.”

I hit him, for real this time. “Perv!”

He rubbed his cheek. “Shut up. Lend me your phone.”

I surrendered my phone over to him and we went to the makemebabies.com site to upload our pictures to see what our future baby would look like.

“Not bad at all,” I said, peering at the picture result staring back at us. “What should we name him?”

We spent the rest of the morning writing down baby names on a paper napkin and arguing about the pros and cons of having second names. We finally settled on Julian, at my insistence, and Juliana in case it turned out to be a girl.

After breakfast, he put his arms around my waist and hugged me and said that we could pretend that I was pregnant for the day, and we spent a little time in the department store looking at baby stuff and getting weird looks from people.

“Are you pregnant?” A sales lady asked, looking down at me dubiously. No wonder, because I look like a 12-year-old. 😛

“Yes,” Daniel said, kissing my cheek. “She’s my wife.”

This made us both crack up, because everyone could see that he was quite obviously gay.

It was still fun walking hand in hand like that and mapping out the life of our future baby. We decided Julian would attend the Avenues school, learn cello and piano, take archery classes, and would be encouraged to learn art. We would spend time with him in museums and libraries and take him travelling.

When it was time for both of us to go, Daniel bent down and planted a kiss on my tummy. “I’ll come back for you soon, baby Julian,” he said jokingly. He then straightened up and pretended to strangle me. “I want that baby,” he reminded me.

I gave him a huge hug and promised to meet up with him soon.

It was just a completely random occurrence, but somehow I feel very cheerful because of it. *pets my own tummy* Good bye, imaginary baby Julian. It was fun having you for a while.

❤

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